12:22 – Okay, gonna wrap this up.
12:05 – We are really, really bad at football. It’s one thing to be bad, but let’s face facts: we may not be the Rams or Lions, but we are only one step above right now.
11:56 – Now, again, to be fair, we are utterly awful. I’m talkin’ Bucs awful here. However, how can you tackle Cory Redding to the ground right before he gets to the QB and not call that a hold?
11:41 – David Hawthorne has 13 tackles. NFL record appears to be 25 in a game, but they don’t actually track tackles as an official stat (or at least, haven’t).
11:33 – What did Dick Stockton and Charles Davis do to deserve all these Hawks games? This is seriously embarrassing. Oh well, at least our coaching staff consistently makes excellent adjustments at half time.
11:22 – Hawks halftime stats: 9 penalties for 59 yards, two fewer than our total offensive production of 61 yards. 0 for 5 on third downs. -6 yards rushing.
11:18 – I can’t believe how embarassingly bad we are. Back to back false starts?
11:14 – Psst. We blow. 21-0 with 1:12 left in the half.
11:06 – Maybe that fumble will teach the officials that the Seahawks are perfectly capable of giving this game to the Vikings all by ourselves.
11:04 – Obamanu with a great return followed by a great fumble right into the Almighty Vikings’ hands. So, uh, there’s a Lions, Browns game on…
10:58 – Dude, this is effing BS. Look, the Vikings are going to beat us, we get that. Stop calling every BS penalty you can think of. Tripping of the runner when you get blocked in the back? Yeah, we’re gonna call the trip, not the block in the back. I HATE THE NFL sometimes.
10:56 – Big Play Babs strikes again.
10:52 – Seriously? SENECAT on 3rd and 2? NO! And Seneca, throw the flippin ball away, why take the sack? FOIHSFONLADDOJBODGU!!!!!
10:49 – No one told Greg Knapp that the Vikings are a very disciplined defense in the short game. Their CBs are injured, lets keep up with the 10-15 yard passes, but you can’t go screen screen screen draw screen screen.
10:45 – Vikings 7 – Seahawks 0. Can the offense respond? We’ve seen nothing to suggest it yet, but hey, who knows.
10:41 – David Hawthorne has almost half of the Seahawks tackles, 8 of 18.
10:39 – “Seahawks defense playing outstanding thus far.” – Dick Stockton. He’s right. Brandon Mebane is like lightning off the snap, it’s ridiculous.
10:37 – Great pressure by Cory Redding. No, that’s not a typo.
10:30 – Oi vey, this is an ugly game. Hawks finally got a first down, andddd that’s about it. Jon Ryan is kicking very well.
10:26 – Seahawks dodged quite a few bullets there. Sloppy as hell game.
10:20 – Good pressure today by the front four, decent secondary play helping them out a lot. Redding with the nice sack, but it would’ve been Mebane if not for Cory. Mebane shed two, maybe three, blockers.
10:16 – Hawthorne just smoked Peterson. Wow.
10:13 – Wow, another horrible drive by the Seahawks. Lets hope the defense can keep up until the offense wakes up. Oh well, at least we finally got to test that “3rd and 11 inside handoff” trick play we’ve been begging for…
10:08 – Tapp! Nice sack, nice first defensive drive by the Hee-Haws.
10:04 – Bad Senec@ package with epic failery on Carlson, but then, what do you expect on that? Burleson had dropped it anyway. Terrible starting drive. Embarassing. Also embarassing: our punt coverage.
10:02 – Nice return by Obo to start it off. These uniforms look weird, but I’m used to it, because Madden got our unis wrong.
10:00 – Dick Stockton and Charles Davis. Aren’t we lucky?
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